me and a friend are new to the game hopeing to get good gear like what you see in the guides and don’t know where and hopeing to make good friends to run with
Welcome to the forum. 
Hope you’re enjoying the game.
As for finding gear, well early on you’re not going to find the gear mentioned in many of the build guides. The best thing to do is explore everywhere, break anything breakable, open anything that can be opened and see what you find. Most items in the game can drop from any foe, crate, breakable, etc. It’s only the MIs (Monster Infrequents) and some uniques that drop from specific foes.
Well, you are playing with a friend, so you´re already ahead! 
GD is mainly focused on solo play, there isn´t much multiplayer action/gameplay other than running dungeons together; not counting crucible.
Questing together kinda only is fun it you start the characters together and only play them together, imo.
So don´t expect too much.
thanks for response but where do I find the gear everyone lese has lol wanna try some of the fun looking stuff
As said, explore everywhere. Most of the stuff you see in the build guides are end game anyway so Ultimate difficulty. You won’t be finding those in Normal/Veteran play. The game has 3 difficulties altogether: Normal/Veteran (for more experienced RPG players), Elite and Ultimate. Legendaries (purple items) - which are the highest tier of items - only start to appear once you hit L50. Max level cap is L100 and top tier items are L94 so even reaching L50 you’re not going to be seeing the very top stuff that soon.
For now just play the game, learn how the different skills work, find where hidden places can appear (some caves have random spawn points for example), note where your characters have problems so you can be better prepared next time to deal with them. Some items can only be crafted by blacksmiths and you have to find the blueprint for them so again exploration is the key.
A new player eh? Welcome onboard
I’d suggest:
- Don’t follow a guide, try picking classes/skills you like and build around them. Reason being, build guides are very optimized around Best in Slot gear, since you don’t have a stash full of legendary items, those builds won’t work.
- Read up on some general tips on building a toon.
- Never give up on a character, sometimes what you build might feel weak and die a lot, but a few devotion points, 1 or 2 new items will change that
Good luck!
I just started GD myself, made a Death Knight and I just entered Ultimate mode. Have found some of the items used in the end-game builds posted on the forum build compendium here. I try not to read guides that much, I prefer to “learn by doing” first. The guides I like are those that include lower tier gear versions such as faction items. So just play, items will drop when you least expect them to
Just running a character or 2 through Elite/Ultimate will get you a decent number of random Legendaries, especially if you also hunt for One-Shots along they way.
I usually end up with at least 5 non-Mythicals whenever I am rushing through Elite/early Ultimate and a few Mythicals towards the end.