in fighting animes, there is this trope that almost always present everywhere.
calling your attacks. or shouting the fighting move you’re gonna do
https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/CallingYourAttacks
Imagine that in some Alternate Grim Dawn Universe (One of Dreeg’s voidtastic ash augments shows a glimpse of alternate reality where the chthonians reign supreme. so grim dawn AUs exists in canon);
all the beings in that Grim Dawn AU are binded by this ‘calling your attacks’ law. even the celestials. even beings that doesn’t make sense like yugol. even your cells (ok that’s too extreme so forget about the microorganisms).
-Story Time! (narrated by inquisitor CreeP and arcanist Olexra ‘can freeze everything’)
celestials
it is said by many inhabitants of grim dawn universe that war of the gods have no winner. because everybody got too tired of shouting their moves all the time even for auto attack moves. even so, some ‘lawful’ celestials persevere with this law though.
empyrion is totally fine with it, obviously.
menhir change his gender by masquerading as vire to try out the feeling of shouting battlecries as female (we’re just as confused with you here).
mogdrogen, being the cool emo he is, just whisper his attack moves quietly. while letting his summons do all the screamings. we have asked mogdrogen about what happened to the arkovian gods and how they dealt with the ‘calling your attacks’ law, but mogdrogen just said that he has no script in his dialogue that answer the question. he theorizes that if you can find all the scattered lego avatar pieces of him, and returning him whole, the answer will be revealed.
the ravager’s shouts of attacks vary a lot depending on his moods (arrogant/berserk/loony. you don’t want to hear his loony shouts. please don’t)
korvaak enjoys this law the most, often shattering the eardrums of every opponents he fights (including his allies and bystander). His defeat by the trio of good witches only adds more fuel to his BURNING, RAGING DESIRE to SHOUT his attack moves. the taken testified that korvaak is the loudest opponent they (yes, they. not he, not she, not it. just accept it forever) ever faced. the taken even enjoy hearing korvaak screaming repeatedly in despair (and RAGE) trying to crush the taken, while the taken taunt korvaak that papa kymon is more challenging than korvaak himself. korvaak blushingly defend himself, yelling that the 3 wimp beating, molesting (bysmiel smirks and pose for AoM load screen), draining, and starving him weakens him so much. not to mention that he gave a lot of his powers to his followers (he regrets it though. hearing his cultists yelling ‘KORVAAK, SAVE ME’ all the time makes him want to turn all his cultists into giant hostile crabby fatties). the taken just nod nonchalantly before banishing korvaak’s loincloth into a galaxy far, far away. korvaak in panic chase his only loincloth after that, never being heard from again.
the 3 good witches then congratulate the taken. while assuring the taken that they will try their hardest to edit this ‘calling your attacks’ law to be appropriated for humanity’s benefit. the taken accept their thanks and just trust them 100% without fuss, since the 3 witches gave him the precious ability to rapidly teleport all over the place in battle.
some crazy people claim that a demigod called lokarr abducts them to fight in gladiator arenas for his amusement. they said that his snarkyly arbitrary comments about their performance in the arena are driving them crazy even more than the stupid ‘calling your attack’ law. this is a false claim. there’s no such being known as lokarr in canon.
another group of deranged individuals claimed that they have witnessed the true god of grim dawn universe and its power. an unassuming crate. they said that this crate is not binded to the ‘calling your attacks’ law, because it is the supreme god of grim dawn universe. they claim that this thing is the being that created the dumb law since the dawn of time. one of the madmen said that this god’s nemesis is a goofy-dumb-but-good-natured bandicoot (no one knows what a bandicoot is. we theorize its just a bandit wearing coat). we want to remind you that these madmen are heretics that wears soiled trousers all their life. so you should guard your mind against these heresy and never think about praying to inanimate crate/box to erase the ‘calling your attacks’ law.
aetherials
some aetherials claim that they rebel against their own master gods because they’re sick of hearing needless shouts upon shouts of battlecries, so some aetherial group invade cairn in an attempt to change this stupid universal law.
their efforts are for naught though. all they’ve accomplished is making cairn uglier than before, and creating obnoxious madmen like:
-krieg (AH. I’VE BEEN EXPECTING YOU. AH. I"VE TOTALLY EXPECTED THAT MOVE. THIS ISN’T EVEN MY FINAL FORM)
-cronley (hahAHAhAhHAhA. HAhahahHahHA. HahHAhAhhHA. (That’s what he says everytime he make attack moves)
-theodin (basically he always spout stuffs about aetherial superiority every time he attacks. or speak artistic stuff about flesh sculpting and how he’ll rearrange your face. also, he’s an ex surgeon. we have files that says he always yell fancy surgeon techniques every time he ‘attacks’ his patients)
when the aetherial invades cairn, it is a widely known fact that the aetherial zombies were also binded by this law. their moans of WOAAOOW, AAARGH, UUUUUUU or some variations of them are actually them shouting their basic attack moves like punch, grab, bite (they can’t kick btw), or vomit (most famous move). sadly no aetherial zombies have provided any info of whether they like this law or not.
the most terrifying aetherial you’ll ever encounter is aleksander. his MEGA ASTEROID OF FIERY DOOM is the most frequent cause of death for good citizens of malmouth. it is said that rooftops and arches are the only reliable defense against this deadly move.
chthonians
many of the gods and their followers who joined chthon said that they choose to be corrupted by the void, because it turned them into monsters who just growled or speak gibberish when they do attack moves. they claim that this is million times better than saying fancy words of battlecries.
some even like being turned into tentacles (because tentacles can’t speak).
bloodsworn cultists that you’ll encounter throughout cairn has pretty quiet and ominous battlecries. we believe these are the main reason so many common people and erulan officers join the bloodsworn. ‘taste the power of chthon…’ ‘chaos bolts…’ ‘sigil of destruction…’ are some examples of common bloodsworn battle’cries’.
beasts
most beasts got it lucky. they can’t speak, so they aren’t really binded to the ‘calling your attacks’ law. however, grobles are the exception. so if you’re being surrounded by grobles, expect to hear ‘surround!’ and ‘nyaaaeaaah!’ a lot.
undead
if you ever encounter any undead that shouts their attack moves, please inform us. if anything, we should pity the undead because they can only says painful growls, moans, and screams.
kymon’s chosen
kymon’s chosen (or empyrion’s chosen, post kymon’s betrayal) always announce their move’s names before attacking. because they are the champion of honor and justice. quiet kymon’s chosen members are rare, because they’ll be immediately treated with suspicion, bullying, reeducation, or execution (for the crime of imitating bloodsworn/death’s vigil’s style of battlecries).
*death’s vigil’
their battlecries’ style are similar to bloodsworn. but cooler (literally and figuratively). some even don’t speak at all, just summoning some undead then lie down and chill until their opponents become their new best friends (and old best friends gets kicked out beyond the veil by accidental summon overwrite)
zantarin is the exception though. because he carries a vitality shotgun of doom (shotgun is loud, so it needs loud battlecries). some says if you look into his eyes closely, you can feel an ominous presence that can’t be [redacted].
rovers
a pacifistic nomad group. they’d rather resolve conflicts peacefully, beg for mercy, flee, or just accept their death, rather than hurting ones that threaten them.
however, they’ll become super zealous and noisy like the kymon’s chosen when meeting any undead.
devil’s crossing
a tough mannered but fair group of survivors. the taken has fond memories of them. each of their fighters have their own unique shouts and technique names that vary wildly in styles.
captain john bourbon is a man of refined gunslinging fighting style. he’s more of a commander rather than fighter though. rumours of his evil clones’ existence should be ignored though, because it’s just a prank spread by the taken.
kasparov should be avoided at all cost. his experimentation upon the ‘calling your attacks’ law has frequently resulted in dangerous stuff like rats in devil’s crossing becoming master martial arts or his poor apprentice expressing odd behaviours to test out new fighting moves (the taken laments one time the apprentice suddenly yelled “DISMANTLE” and literally dismantle all of the taken’s currently equipped gears and clothes).
hangman jarvis doesn’t need to do any fighting moves. he just belittles, humiliates, mocks, and trash talks his opponent into despair. then preach them the greatness of the gallows constellation, and finally hand them a rope to join the gallows cult. needless to say, he has no friends (the taken says that jarvis is just a ‘tsundere’. whatever that means)
cronley’s gang (or random bandits since cronley is very dead now)
a gang of bandits wearing wild west clothes that hangs around in the mine which produces endless dynamites. they use taunts as their battlecries. they love to call your attention (“HEY! YOU!”) and cutting people’s faces for face pizza. all their women are dominatrix that enslave the crooked men (the women likes to shout “GET 'EM, BOYS!” when doing bandit stuff together). cronley holds the ultimate power here though. probably because he’s so good at jamming diablo crystals into people’s forehead and transforming them into dark wanderers.
fabius ‘the unseen’ gonzar is the strongest fighter in cronley’s gang though. many wonders why he doesn’t backstab cronley and take power himself. we think its because his middle name is ‘the unseen’. if you see him carrying 2 notched axe of thousand death, run away. (the taken remembers the time fabius carry the twin axe, and gibbed the taken instantly. we’re sorry that we can’t provide the reason why the taken is still alive)
homestead
a community of farmers. toxic farmers. they really hate pests such as dermapterans. so they develop many types of toxins and pesticides to deal with problems to their farms. some of them even creates the martial arts “poop style no jutsu”, of which the members are famous for their soiled trousers and toxic attitude. Dreeg cultists love hanging out here.
daila thornsbury is a famous fanfiction writer that lives in homestead. when not writing fanfics, watching her daughter, or travelling around the world, she can be found in the hot lava-filled ruins of korvan city, chilling around her campfire (yes. chilling near a campfire while surrounded by lavas. our common sense says that she just don’t like the taste of beast meat roasted over lava. hence the campfire)
black legion
serious army group that does everything in serious manner. all their shouts of battlecries are done seriously with no joke at all. Oleron’s name is frequently shouted by them in battle. Some says that Oleron is Kratos, the forgotten god of war. but that is completely wrong, since Oleron has long hair, while Kratos is bald. baldiness doesn’t give you power to one punch everything to death btw.
inquisitor creed is totally unrelated to inquisitor CreeP. inquisitor creed is the main protagonist of Grim Dawn, so he has a lot of tricks in his sleeve. btw the taken wants to take vacation building up some towns, so creed become the main protagonist. no, won’t share his inquisitor toys with you.
ulgrim is the greatest chef in cairn. he has many flavors of fighting moves. he does his moves and battlecries in style and elegance with casual manner. his greatest feat of achievement is teaching edward (the cook of devil’s crossing) how to cook edible and delicious rock soup.
the outcast
the outcast is anasteria. an old crone sharing consciousness with a friendly aetherial. a friendly and helpful witch, but she will spam multiple simultaneous devastating aetherial flames on you if you in some unthinkable way decide to betray her for the super serious black legion sergeant paranoidus.
coven of ugdenbog
a coven of young and old magical girls that hangs out in a jungle filled with monsters, disease, hostile cannibals, and friendly cannibals. as you can expect, they have lots of magic spells to cast upon your sorry posterior if you decide to act creepy towards them.
they also have severus snape as their potion master.
last but not least, bysmiel disguise herself as a male bysmiel cultist in this coven. we think this is the main reason why bysmiel become the loading screen wallpaper of AoM expansion.
barrowholm
a friendly community of human flesh connoisseur. its always sunny in barrowholm. if you can befriend its friendly village chief scorv egdenor, he will teach you the secret of becoming friendly vampire and cooking lessons on how to make delicious foods out of your enemies while battling them. scorv egdenor also has secret technique of “permanent smirk no jutsu” that is granted by his patron deity the ravager.
malmouth resistance
a desperate group of warriors besieged and toyed with by the aetherials in malmouth city, they’ve developed gears and techniques to fly and cut into the napes of giant aetherial colossi/behemoth. a shining example of humanity’s persistence for survival, you can always hear the battlecries of malmouth warriors throughout the city’s ruins. their battlecries will seep into your souls and make you weep in awe. they really need any help you can give, so donate what you can to them and always pray for their safety! the taken likes to hang out in their sewer hideout, because they have the coolest hideout music in grim dawn.
the 3 witch gods’ cults
in the conclave of the 3, you can find a large gathering of humanity’s strongest (yes, the cults have higher faction level item compared to black legion and malmouth resistance) secret army. also, the 3 witch gods are forced to squat in this camp, because korvaak peed on their thrones as revenge for not giving him toilet breaks.
solael/sagon is the leader of the 3 witch gods. he’s a vampire lord. he really likes to drink blood and vital essence. he likes chaos damage. he hates rituals that takes too much time. will taunt and scream at his opponents like khorne berserkers then instantly snuff them out with chaos flame. he’s also bald. rumored to be ex-lover of bysmiel, but breaks up with her when bysmiel scheme her way into becoming AoM load screen wallpaper without her actually present in AoM.
bysmiel/byscilla/an ordinary spider/everyone you’ve met/you (she’s a shapeshifter. ok?) is the spymaster of the 3 witch gods. she likes games involving thrones and molesting gods. she likes pets (especially spiderman). she likes necromancy. she’ll likely just stand in the background when fighting, and let her pets do all the hard work, so she doesn’t need any battlecries. she wants to become the load screen wallpaper of forgotten gods, but the powers that be decides riggs is the better choice, because he’s a buffed out man in desert warrior gears that works as a merchant. bysmiel dislike pets that dies too quickly, because that means she need to chant new summoning spells to replace them. so AoE specialist will ruin bysmiel’s day.
dreeg/draellus is staring at you. asking why do you read this thread. then he shrugs and says that he hates the author of this thread because he’s pulled from the canon grim dawn universe to this dumb AU where everyone shouts their attack moves. he says that he doesn’t have battlecries for his moves because he has broken the 4th wall and detach himself from the dumb anime law. he’s currently fuming in his tent waiting for the author to finish this derpy thread so that he can go back to canon grim dawn world and work with crate to make gd2.
the various cultists of the 3 has their battlecries influenced by their patron god.
solael cultists shout like berserkers and anime savage villains.
bysmiel cultists shout randomly and deceptively. many times terrorizing their enemies with terrifying battlecries while in fact they’re casting spells to runaway/hide/pet their pets so the pets get lots of buffs/drink their wine in glasses while saying ‘just as planned’.
dreeg cultists will either shout predictions of their opponents’ moves, or shout nonsensical stuffs like darkest dungeon’s stressed out characters because they can’t handle dreeg’s gift.
eldritch
for the most part, eldritch creatures are like beasts/undead. which has no battlecries. however, korvaak cultists are considered eldritch creatures (due to korvaak the eldritch sun blessing them with eldritch powers).
your average korvaak cultists have battlecries that always include praises for korvaak. they are most famous for their deathcries however (KORVAAK, SAVE ME!), after which korvaak usually just turn them into korvaak’s dredge to silence them. the taken loves to hear the cultists’s deathcries, and wonder if there’s any musician left in cairn that can sing a song about korvaak cultists pleading korvaak to save them from the awesome taken.
korvaak rageflame/ascendant are fat giant transformation korvaak cultist which has claws for hand (we wonder how they clean up their posterior after pooping) and magma hole for stomach. their battlecries are quite similar to normal korvaan cultists, but frequently gets interrupted by pain from stomach indigestion (KNEEL BEFORE KOR- UOOOOO x_x). can fire meteor from their stomach. can call meteor from the sky (if their stomach are tired). Kaisan (not to be confused by Kai’sa from league of legends) is the most dangerous korvaak ascendant. he likes to cast green bolt of doom if you refuse to be close near him (maybe he likes hug). to this day, we don’t know why korvaak has a tendency to turn his ascendants into fat giants with claw for hands. maybe being malnourished and molested by bysmiel makes korvaak wish to be fat from being full of nutrition.
korvaak’s messenger has a very unique battlecries. the taken note with lots of laugh that the messenger often shouts his move in duplicates over his own voice (YO-YO-UR-UR IN-IN-SO-SO-LENCE-LENCE MUST-MUST BE-BE PU-PU-NISHED-NISHED). the taken also mentioned that you can say hi to korvaak’s messenger in kymon’s chosen hideout. sadly, the messenger never accept the taken or any other new recruits to join the korvaak cult because crate railroaded everyone to hate the korvaak cult.
~Here’s some recording of the taken obeying the law of ‘calling your moves’ in combat~:
-soldier:
BLITZ! WAR CRY! stab stab CADENCE! stab stab CADENCE! stab stab CADOUNTER STRIKE!
BLITZ! WAR CRY! BLADE ARC! BLADE ARC! BLADE ARC! BLADE ARC! drink energy potion BLITE ARC! BLADE ARC!~
WAR CRY! FORCEWAVE! FORCEWAVE! FORCEWAVE! FORCEWAVE! FORCEWAVE!
-demolitionist:
FIRE STRIKE! FIRE STRIKE! FIRE STRIKE! FIRE STRIKE! FIRE STRIKE!
GRENADO! GRENADO! GRENADO! GRENADO! GRENADO! GRENADO!
FIRE NADO STRIKE! FIRE NADO STRIKE! FIRE NADO STRIKE!
FIRE WATER COCK NADO STRIKE! FIRE WATER COCK NADO STRIKE!
STUN WATER COCK NADO NISTER BOMB MITE MINE!
-occultist:
SUMMON FAMILIAR! SUMMON HELLHOUND! CURSE OF FRAILTY! SIGIL OF CONSUMPTION! DREEG’S EVIL BLOODY POOM BOLT OF DREEG!
(we notice there’s no occultist’s active attack spell that invokes solael and bysmiel’s name. this proves dreeg’s superiority over the other two)
-nightblade:
PNEUMATIC BURST! SHADOW STRIKE! AMARASTA’S BLADE BURST! BELGOTHIAN’S NIDALLA’S HIDDEN AMARASTA’S QUICK WHIRLING EXECUTION RING OF STEEL! PHANTASMAL BLADE! PHANTASMAL BLADE! PHANTASMAL BLADEMATIC BURST! BLADE BARRIER!
~
~
~
BLADE TRAP!
-arcanist:
DEVASTATION! PANETTI’S REPLICATING MISSILE! PANETTI’S REPLICATING MISSILE! PANETTI’S REPLICATING MISSILE! PANETTI’S REPLICATING MISSILE! PANETTI’S REPLICATING MISSILE! PANETTI’S REPLICATING MISSILE! PANETTI’S REPLICATING MISSILE! PANETTI’S REPLICATING BREAD!
DEVASTATION! OLEXRA’S FLASH FREEZE THAT CAN FREEZE BOSSES! CALLIDOR’S TEMPEST! CALLIDOR’S TEMPEST! CALLIDOR’S TEMPEST! CALLIDOR’S TEMPEST! CALLIDOR’S TEMPEST! CALLIDOR’S TEMPEST! CALLIDOR’S TEMPEST!
(we want to notify you, the taken has huge cast speed when casting CALLIDOR’S TEMPEST!, this combined with the awkward casting animation results in the taken flapping their arm like chicken that hopelessly try to fly. that is all)
DEVASTATION!
TROZAN’S SKY SHARD!
TROZAN’S SKY SHARD!
TROZAN’S SKY SHARD!
DEVASTATION! ALBRECHT’S AETHER RAY! kite ALBRECHT’S AETHER RAY! kite ALBRECHT’S AETHER drink energy potion ALBRECHT’S AETHER RAY! kite ALBRECHT’S AETHER MIRROR OF EREOCTES! ALBRECHT’S AETHER RAY!~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
-shaman:
WIND DEVIL! WENDIGO TOTEM! SAVAGERY! SAVAGERY! BRUTE FORCE! FERAL HUNGER! UPHEAVAL! SAVAGERY! PRIMAL STRIKE! PRIMAL STRIKE! PRIMAL STRIKE! WIND DEVIL! SAVAGERY! SAVAGERY! SAVAGERY! I’M A SAVAGE!
-Inquisitor:
WORD OF RENEWAL! INQUISITOR SEAL! STORM BOX OF ELGOLOTH! WORD OF PAIN! BURSTING ROUND! CHILLING ROUND! STORM SPREAD! BURSTING AND CHILLING IN THE STORM! PAINFUL WORD OF CRITICS! INQUISITOR SEAL OF APPROVAL! HAGARRAD’S KALASTORIAN’S FLAME OF IGNAFFAR’S PAINFUL GANDALF OF HORN!
-necromancer:
RAISE SKELETONS!
~
~
~
RAISE SKELETONS!
~
~
~
RAISE SKELETONS!
~
~
~
(we interrupt you to inform that the necromancer we showed are playing lazily, and it doesn’t reflect the very active playstyle of serious necromancers)
-oathkeeper:
EYE OF RECKONING! proceed to spin2win
(actual oathkeeper spin2win playstyle isn’t as simple as we shown. please read proper guides if you want to play good)
-classless:
NORMAL STRIKE! NORMAL STRIKE! NORMAL STRIKE! NORMAL STRIKE! NORMAL STRIKE! NORMAL STRIKE! NORMAL STRIKE! NORMAL STRIKE! NORMAL STRIKE! NORMAL STRIKE! NORMAL STRIKE! NORMAL STRIKE!
as you can see, a grim dawn AU where everyone shout their attack moves like in fighting animes is a terrifying place indeed. no mortal/immortal/celestial should be exposed to this unreality. we haven’t even shown how the taken would cope having devotion/item abilities and procs simultaneously with their active skill (shudder)
so… forget what you ever saw in this thread. don’t ever imagine it. don’t mix grim dawn with fighting anime. we are sorry for wasting your time with this derp thread. have a good day/night!
dreeg destroys the nonexistent inquisitor CreeP and arcanist Olexra ‘can freeze everything’, curse the thread author, then destroy the accursed AU
thread author goes to sleep
